I remember my parents receiving chain letters in the mail.  These letters would tell about all of the great things that would happen to people continuing the chain and all of the terrible events that would befall those who broke the chain.  Try to read that last part with a spooky foreboding voice for effect.

Enter the internet.

I don’t know how many times that I’ve had to ask people to “please, please, stop sending me this shit”.  Most of these emails would say ‘send to nine people and the one who sent it to you”.  In order to avoid conflict at first, I would just blind copy it and send it back to the superstitious human sending it to me.

The one that finally pushed me over the edge told me that if I didn’t send it to 10 people it meant that I was embarrassed of Jesus and would be condemned for it.  Wow.  Really?  Chain letters can affect my entrance into the Kingdom?  I don’t remember reading that in the bible.

So I spoke up and took a stand.

Now, I am happy to report that I do not receive this bullshit anymore and my life is unfolding just as it should.  Regardless of all of the chains I have broken (again, with a foreboding voice).  That being said, the end of time will tell if I show up to the gates of paradise with angels shaking their heads saying, “oh my, you really should have sent that Jesus chain mail to 10 people”.

Ps.  I’m still waiting for my $50 000 dollars from Bill Gates.